Reborn of Rani Laxmibai
Rani Laxmibai, the name that is worshipped and sacrosanct across the nation is in a pool of blood while breathing heavily. May be I am breathing my last gulp of air. My life is going to end but I don’t have any regrets as I know I had fought ferociously, fearlessly till my motionless mortal body fell on the earth. I felt the life was going from my severe wounded body making me suffocated and gasping. Within seconds I am light and relaxed. There is no pain, no aches, no sufferings but just the peace and tranquillity. I am liberated from my dead body. Now I am a soul, a free soul and a satisfied soul. I have tried my best, fought for my nation, fought for my folks and for the women who were oblivious of their inner power.
They called me as the embodiment of Goddess Durga when I was killing the enemies with sword in both of my hands while riding the horse with its rein in my mouth. Everyone was awestruck as they saw the image of a woman they had never seen in their life. The fierceness, the bravery of their queen made them to think me as the Goddess. But I was not a Goddess but a mere mortal woman who never feared any one, never sacrificed her self-respect and never bowed before any kind of injustice.
The patriarchal minded People who consider women as timid, docile and submissive fears my aggressive image. The women who were marginalised from the warfare, never went to the field of war I taught them how to fight? How to fight for yourself, for the safety of others or for the sake of your motherland? Now I feel proud that I have done the duty from my part. Today may be I am a soul but had already lighted the light of courage in the heart of my people who will never quit the fight.
Before departing I opened my eyes to see my surrounding. I am shocked and surprised it is not the battle field. There are no soldiers, no weapons, no horses and no British people. Then with whom I was fighting so vehemently? What caused me to fight till my last breath? I kept wondering until I saw some people who are frightened panting to catch their breath. It took me some seconds to identify them. They say a soul never feels a thing but my soul quivered in anger.
“She is not breathing. I think she is dead. What we will do now?” I hear them say.
“What a woman she was? I have never seen a woman fight like this in my whole life. She could have killed us all at a time. Thankfully I had a knife with me that saved us.” He managed to catch his breath but panting heavily. What they don’t know me? They never heard the bravery of Rani Laxmibai?
“We are not saved. We are doomed. We have killed her and now media, public and police will not leave us.” He started crying. But I am not able to understand a thing. Media, police and public what are these things anyway?
“Just shut up. It was all her fault. She was the one who pounced upon us like a tigress. We never did anything to her. Why did she interfere in the matter that was not related to her?” Now the clouds are moving away and I can see things clearly.
It is not the body of Rani Laxmibai with its face buried on the ground; this is Rani a middle class working woman who juggles between her work and home every day. It is not the nineteenth century era but the twenty first century era. Till now I was very much unaware of my identity but death removed the obstacles of darkness and put light on my thoughts. I am the soul Of Rani Laxmibai who took another life another birth and came to the earth to see if that independence for whom I fought my whole life is enjoyed by the people or not. After my birth I forgot my past life regression and started living like an ordinary girl who has to go through a series of ordinance just for her gender.
At the teen age I was touched improperly by my own relative. But ordinary was my body not my inner soul which made me fights against all injustices. The cousin brother who had tried to molest suffered lots of bruises all over his body and the injuries were so severe that he had to admit in the hospital. Only my mother knew about all this and she had made me promise that I will not disclose this in front of any single soul. Everybody thought he escaped through a robbery but he escaped from my clutches, from the clutches of a tigress.
“Rani you have beaten him so badly. I have never sent you to any self defence school. From where did you have learned all these things? He is ten years elder than you and you can still managed to overpower him?” My mother’s voice was filled with astonishment and disbelief. But it was clear that she was very proud of her daughter’s potency.
“Sometimes you have to compromise in your life. We have to live in the society, not outside of it. Dowry is a societal system and if I am willing to give the dowry in your marriage then why you are getting so furious about it? If you will continue this attitude of yours you will never get married. ” My father’s words were like weapons that had pierced my self esteem.
While looking back I still wonder where is that independence has gone which was the sole motto of our life. If Rani was not allowed to go outside after the darkness, if any woman is not safe on the streets of India after midnight, if no woman is not independent enough to live their life on her own terms then what is the definition of so called independence? Today also I sacrificed my life for independence but I did not die the death of a martyr whose names will be written in the history with the golden letters, who will be remembered for the generations to come. They are trying to burn my body and it will turn into the ashes. No one will remember Rani that she fought till her last breath for the dignity and freedom of another woman.
But I am the warrior queen Rani laxmibai. From the burnt ashes I will emerge as a phoenix to breathe and to take a flight towards a new journey filled with hope and the aspirations. I will again fight against this patriarchal society for its marginalised woman. I will not let the society silence the deep breath of the woman who is burdened with the shackles of gender discrimination. The gone queen will again come back here to make her new kingdom, a new world where there will be no dependency, no fear, and no violence... where women can peacefully breathe.
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